I used to wear heels a lot, but as of late, have given up on them because they hurt too much. I only learned why recently.
When it comes to wearing grown-up shoes, I was an early bloomer. Blame Spice Girls. When my school classmates were wearing sandals to UPSR crash course classes at night… I was already in heels . As I was growing up, I used what’s left of my allowance to buy more high heels when I hit the malls — different types, in different colors. Before I knew it, I had 25 fancy pairs of them by the time I went to college.
See, I was accustomed to wearing them. I was happily walking and running in them. No problem!
That all changed with time. Slowly, I felt less comfortable wearing heels. Sometimes they hurt.
Since I started working, I wore more closed-toe pumps. Not very comfortable, but I was forcing my feet into Ferragamo heels and wore them to work everyday, trying to convince myself that my feet will get used to them. Also, Mama thinks she has nice feet because she wears these pumps. Surely I’ll get nice feet like, her, too?
Suck it up. These heels will be comfortable when they break-in and you’ll have nice feet before you know it, I told myself. Wishful thinking!
But they never did feel comfortable. So I gave up on all the heels I have. Including the pumps for work I bought earlier this year from Geox, a reputable shoemaker, known for their comfortable shoes.
Why?! Why?! Why?!
This is the age to wear heels. Career women wear heels! Sadly, I can’t be part of it. Sobs.
To make it worse, walking in flats began to hurt, too. None of the flats I owned was comfortable, even after putting arch support gels on the insoles. Today, I have zero casual shoes for daily wear, so I wear Mama’s broken in French Sole flats to work, bearable for short distances.
What’s wrong with me — why can other people shop for shoes so easily when I have so much trouble?
I started to think that I may be the problem. So I went to read this up on the internet.
There are these bumps beside my big toenails and they’re called “bunions”. I’ve been aware of their existence for 5 years now, but I thought that they were natural occurrences that happen to people who are, well, unfortunate. Like me. I knew that having them means I have to wear wide shoes to make space for it.
It’s not until I read up further that I learned that bunions are deformities associated with wearing high heels and shoes that are too tight, which eventually molds the joints in the feet and changes their alignment (read here) and because of this, the balls of my feet hurt. They won’t get better and if I put more pressure on my feet, they’ll get worse.
All those years of wearing heels and forcing myself into shoes that were too tight. I’m paying for it now -_- Sigh, never again.
The bunions I have is mild compared to the rest of the bunion community on the internet (see here), but the pain is sometimes unbearable. There are several ways for coping with the pain, but to effectively get rid of it and be able to wear whatever shoe I want, I’ll need surgery, but I’ve got no time for that now.
So… the best thing I can do is to wear shoes meant for people who have bunions. I have accepted the fact that I should only wear shoes that provide proper arch support, wide enough to make room for the bunions and made of soft leather to relieve the pain. Only bother with heels when there’s an event involving walking super short distances.
Hey, on the bright side, I’ll need to do a lot of walking soon, so it’s high time to go shoe hunting yay!